on relationships

Jen explained to me once that it's healthy for even the deepest relationships to shift, and that oftentimes the nature of these shifts resemble the changing of seasons.

At the time, I was in a weird, limbo-ish space in one of my relationships, and when I heard those words, I got it. Let it be. The person on the other end needed space away from me, so I let that happen. Eventually summer faded into autumn and this relationship started up again, expanding deeper than it was before.

One thing I'm really tired of though is trying to hold onto relationships that are not nurtured enough or the ones that are falling through the cracks. Friends, family ... sometimes we just outgrow each other. And what happens then? What do you do, just let them slip away?

I don't know. 

For seeds to grow, they need watering otherwise they dry up and shrivel to nothing. 

One of the ingredients in a friendship stew is substance with a hefty dash of reciprocation. When you don't have that, and if you're not on an extended (or seasonal) break, well then ... let the pieces fall where they may. You don't have to spend your time on salvaging.

And that's really where I am right now: done salvaging what's not there - and nourishing what's right in front of me.

Comments

[Clarice]

Thanks for your thoughts, Bella. I have been thinking a lot about friendships the past few days, and then saw your post.

[Gerri]

Amen and amen...

[gillian]

Aw Bella boo, I hear you. It has happened both to me and by me.
When it does, I now (NOW, not before but only now) try to stay in the moment of what I'm experiencing and that really allows the letting go of that which doesn't nurture my highest self. My soul knows what I need, I must trust that.

The other thing is, you are just so wonderful in case I haven't told you lately.
xo G

[Tina]

Like a boss Bellz.